Disappointing, I know. Even after being so jazzed up on my first post. After all the support, all the well-wishing, all the pats on the back and all the positive vibes I simply quit.
That's the question I've gotten hit with so many times since this endeavor took a small detour. And there's no real way to excuse the fact that I lost drive. I guess all there is to say is a line I'll have to borrow from the movie The Words.
I had a few more volunteering experiences after April 27th, but I didn't follow through on documenting it. One skipped day turned into two, then two into 4 and so the gap grew exponentially, so I went on with my life.
However, it was during the course of that mundane life that I came across a motivator. I got a jolt of inspiration, all because of another blog.
There I was sitting in front of my computer (for those who are wondering yes, it's a Macbook) and by accident came across this website:
If you have nothing better to do, if you should have something better to do, if you need something to do, if you have enough to do and yet need something even more important to do, READ THAT BLOG!
Whether you're into financial responsibility or not, you need to take the time to read the account of Joe Mihalic, a Harvard Business School graduate that decided he wouldn't be defined by his monthly payment towards a $90k student loan for the better part of his professional life. This story is more than just an story of a guy who wanted to be debt free. It's about passion, drive and focus; things I've been lacking.
It was like a good book I couldn't put down. I don't know if it was the humor, or the down-to-earth characteristics of the author. But I read the whole thing in less than a day. It gave me the renewed focus I'd been needing for a long time.
A very wise person once told me:
I think you’re a perfectionist. I think that in this world, perfectionists have a hard time succeeding. There are those who sometimes manage to do it, but only after they’ve gotten their start by doing things in a “good enough” fashion. You’re obsessing with perfection when “good enough” is what you need to be worrying about. Again, I might be reading too far into this, but I remain convinced that you have self-doubt, a doubt about executing flawlessly, when in fact, just executing imperfectly is what you need to be doing.
Talk about hitting the nail on the head!
It reminds me of Coach Lombardi's famous quote:
So I'm going to chase after perfection, and hope for the best.
So.... What have I been up to in these last 249 days, or 8 months 5 days, or... well you get the idea.
Remember that corp job I declined initially? Well, I ended up taking it.
Do I regret it? Deep down, probably. But if I really meditate on the point, I can't. I'd like to think this relocation has changed me, for the best. I've been living in a suburb a few minutes outside of St. Louis, Missouri.
One thing I will say, the Beach Boys were right when they sang the lyrics, "the Midwest farmers' daughters, really make you feel alright." The girls out here are gorgeous! Sorry CA girls... just gotta call it like I see it! And that's all I'll say about that.
I know, focus... focus!
With regards to the message I'm trying to promote with this blog, I have to share that I haven't done much to advance my work in this part of the county. I've had a few opportunities to get involved, however, because of the position I took and the responsibilities I took with it, I haven't been able to allocate any time to volunteering.
After almost 6 months of working here I'm ready to buckle down. I've made a few connections that will allow me the opportunities I need to get back on track. I no longer have the focus of volunteering only for a full year. All I know is that I want to invest my time (the little that I have to myself) in more fulfilling ways. There is so much to do, and here I am watching Lost on Netflix. Yeah, I know... I know.
I know it's cliché, but I think the new year couldn't come at a better time.
Time to do something worthwhile.